Tagged with " politics"
Apr 22, 2008 - Uncategorized    No Comments

Reconciliation or bust!

We have all heard that making the most spirited kid, class prefect would ensure discipline in the class room. PPP’s provincial government is taking this adage to an unheard of extreme.


According to Daily Times, provincial government is in talks with the notorious criminal Rehman Dakait and he would be pardoned if he cooperates with the government. Apparently, the infamous dakait has met with provincial home minister and king maker par excellence Mr. Asif Ali Zardari, and if everything falls through, he could be one of the numerous ministers in the cabinet. Previously we have only had ‘kaam ke dakait’ as ministers, now we will have a ‘naam ka dakait’ who is a ‘kaam ka dakait’ as well.

Asif Sahib, like every patriotic Pakistani, I am all for national reconciliation, but this is taking reconciliation to the point of no return. Its reconciliation or bust!

Here is the detailed story:

KARACHI: Lyari’s most prominent mafioso Rehman Dakait and his group are holding talks with the government to surrender in exchange for becoming public servants, Daily Times has learnt.

Pakistan People’s Party (PPP) member in the National Assembly Nabeel Gabol claimed the credit for the developments. “These all are my efforts. I talked with the gangsters and offered them a package,” he told Daily Times. He said that all cases registered against the outlaws would be rechecked, because “police nominated them in a majority of fake cases”. He said that “minor cases” against the mafiosi would be cleared.

Gabol claimed to have sought a surety from the mafiosi about wiping out the entire Lyari area of all illegal weapons upon their release. He said the government would offer employment opportunities to the outlaws.

Sources said that Dakait could even be a minister in the future. The mafiosi who have reportedly agreed to surrender include the members of sub-groups such as Baba Ladla, Abdul Jabbar Jhengu and Jabbar Lungra. Sindh Home Minister Dr Zulfiqar Mirza confirmed the reports.

“We have some unofficial reports on the surrender of Lyari’s mafia groups,” he said, adding, “If these gangsters want to surrender and be public servants, it would be good.”

He said that cases registered against Mafiosi would be studied and that they would be “facilitated as much as possible according to the law”. There are several possible motives behind such meetings. The first is to maintain law and order in Lyari and to end the conflict between gangs. The second is that the people of Lyari, especially the Rehman Dakait group, oppose Gabol because according to them he did not favour them since his election in 2002. Gabol’s “indifference” led to the defection of several PPP workers and members of the Rehman Dakait group to the rival Muttahida Qaumi Movement (MQM). Some even demanded Gabol’s removal from the party, upon which he is said to have met Dakait and assured of his full support.

Dakait mostly led the PPP rallies before and after the elections. Recently, Dakait and Gabol met PPP Co-chairman Asif Ali Zardari in Islamabad. Zardari and Gabol assured Dakait that cases against him would be settled.

There were reports that Gabol met Haji Lalu, the father of Arshad Pappu, in jail. Lalu is the pioneer of drug business in Karachi, whereas Dakait had worked under Lalu. Nowadays, Lalu and his three sons are in jail. The members of Arshad Pappu’s gang, Ghaffar Zikri and Dr Shoaib, have also agreed to surrender.

Also, there were reports that Gabol was indifferent to the Arshad Pappu group because of its meagre influence, mostly owing to the unavailability of leadership. That’s why Pappu’s group is depending on Ghaffar Zikri and Dr Shoaib — the chiefs of Pappu’s sub-groups.

Pappu’s hold has been limited to Zikri Mohalla and Para, while Dakait’s group has taken control of nearly 99 percent of the areas in Lyari. Sources said that their arrests may soon be shown in a fake encounter, after Dakait’s meeting with high officials of Sindh police. Dakait has also demanded not be killed in an encounter.

The Sindh home minister said in a recent press conference on Lyari, “It is not necessary to kill people to stop the violence. Unemployment is a major cause behind it and we will provide employment.”

Nowadays, Rehman Dakait himself is taking interest in eliminating street crimes in Lyari by putting up banners saying, “Lyari ki awam Sardar Abdul Rehman bhai kay shukarguzar hain kay unhon nay Lyari main aman barqarar rakhnay kay liye apna bharpur kirdaar ada kia” (We, the people of Lyari, thank Sardar [lord] Abdul Rehman for trying his best in maintaining peace in the town).

In a related news, it is learned that with the recent announcement of hundreds of vacancies in the Sindh police and government, many people from Lyari, including gangsters have started contacting Rehman Dakait for recommendations to join the force, Daily Times has learnt. It is believed that the Lyari gangsters themselves will police Lyari.

Apr 21, 2008 - Uncategorized    No Comments

Ooper Khuda, neechay Huda

Hamid Mir broke this story in The News today which is about the de facto CM of Sindh. According to the news, the man who has ruled Sindh as a de facto chief minister for many years finally lost his powers on Saturday.


Brigadier Huda, who was an ISI commander in Sindh, was in fact the caretaker of the MQM-PML-Q provincial coalition government. He was responsible for running the coalition in a smooth manner. All major decisions were taken after his consultation.

He resolved the differences between former CM Arbab Ghulam Rahim and the MQM many a time. Many provincial ministers even used to say “ooper Khuda aur neechay Huda”. The brigadier’s name figured in the power circles of Islamabad in the evening of May 12, 2007. Brigadier Huda was given credit for the show of massive government power in Karachi on that day.

Initially, the MQM was reluctant to hold a rally in Karachi on May 12. The then ISI DG Gen Ashfaq Kayani also had the same opinion that the MQM should not come out on the streets when Justice Iftikhar Muhammad Chaudhry would visit Karachi. It was Huda who played an important role in convincing the MQM not to cancel its rally. He assured the MQM leadership that there will be no riots on that day though he was proved wrong. He was supposed to be very close to the then Army chief General Pervez Musharraf. However, no action was taken against him.

The blasts in the rally of Benazir Bhutto on October 18, 2007 in Karachi were another failure of Brigadier Huda. He was responsible for the security of Benazir Bhutto on that day more than anybody else. However, he was not transferred despite his repeated failures. His downfall started on April 9, 2008, when many people including lawyers were killed in the Karachi violence. It was another failure on the part of Huda. The new PPP government in Sindh felt that Brigadier Huda was still having immense political influence. It believed that he was in contact with the anti-PPP forces. Many important bureaucrats reported to the provincial government that Huda was interfering in different departments. He was more interested in “political makings and breakings” than doing his security job.

After reading this, all I could think of was: Poor Arbab Rahim, he had to endure the indignity of being booted out of the assembly when it was Huda sahib who was responsible for everything that ever went wrong in the land of sufis. Another thought that came to my mind was that Hamid Mir was the one who knew all about the siyasi shenanigans taking place there and broke the news.

Apr 17, 2008 - Uncategorized    No Comments

Sarkari have hots

When Vaneeza Ahmed declared President Pervez Musharraf as the hottest man in Pakistan back in 2004 (in Herald’s Annual issue), Mush, indeed was a hot property, riding the popular wave, with no opposition to speak of. But I was shocked out of my skin (metaphorically of course) when I read that, because I thought Vinnie would have a better taste in men than falling for an aging generalissimo. I personally abhor all men who dye their hair. Men with mile wide eye bags and loose hanging jowls don’t gel well with jet black hair (And Mush keep changing his hair colour, at times it is cherry blossom black, at times it is mahogany brown and at times rusty brown!) So I really cant get the fascination most women HAD with Mush (a huge majority of them is Indian), a lot of auntis still have for Imran Khan and Shobha De has for Asif Zardari. They all wear khizab (hair dye for the uninitiated) unabashedly (Imran Khan is one step ahead and wears artificial hair as well) and hardly say anything remotely intelligent, if ever.

You can imagine how big a shock it must have been for me when one Pakistani beauty pageants winner said that apna Mush is a “hunk”.

According to news reports, reigning Miss Pakistan World Mahleej Sarkari found time last week to write a post on Musharraf on the pageant’s website.

“A little note to the people of Pakistan. Going to international pageants we have found out how much Musharraf is known to all beautiful young girls, the beauty queens. Some have replied, ‘Oh yes, the general man (sic)’. While others have said ‘the man who rules Pakistan‘,” wrote Sarkari.

Sarkari said she would love to date Musharraf if he asked her out. “Yes, any time…I like him a lot…,” she told a news portal.

Sarkari also said she thought “Mrs Musharraf would nod her head in agreement that her husband is an icon no matter what happens”.

Sonia Ahmed, founder of the Miss Pakistan World pageant, too is a huge Musharraf fan. On the pageant’s website, there are several shots of beauty queens holding up Musharraf’s picture, blowing kisses and saying, “We love you Mushy”.

“Well, I am a huge fan of President Musharraf and so are my Miss and Mrs Pakistans and I don’t know why but we all look up to him as a man who gave freedom to the entertainment industry and media.

“There is no PPP or Nawaz that gave that freedom, however they are all claiming that they are ‘oh so moderate!'” Ahmed said in a statement.

Pakistanis have been winning quite a few pageants internationally. A Pakistani girl was declared runner-up for the Miss Disco Queen contest earlier this month.

Sarkari represented Pakistan in the Miss Tourism Queen International contest earlier this month in China.

While most contestants taking part in such pageants are non-resident Pakistanis, a few residents are flying out of the country to make a mark at these events.

Sarkari, a Baloch, was raised in Karachi and has been in Toronto for the past six years. She had gone to Canada to study but stayed on and now runs a spa business there.

“We are showing people that young women from Pakistan deserve a voice and can do great things when given the chance. On an international level, we have far surpassed our goals bringing home six international titles within the past five years,” Ahmed said.

When reminded that Musharraf was not exactly popular in her home province of Balochistan, she said, “I don’t care…that’s politics.”

Sarkari bibi may not care much for politics, but Pakistani awam cant think anything beyond that, all the major newspapers’ headline this morning was Prime Minister’s comment on impeachment of the president. As far as Sarkari is concerned, I feel sorry for her. Not only she had to live her life with a name like sarkari, she had to fall for a man who is not only old enough to be her dad but who has a really bad hair stylist who cannot stick to one hair colour. A friend very correctly commented on Sarkari’s dilemma, “Once your parents have named you Sarakari, they have pretty much mapped out your dating future.”

Apr 17, 2008 - Society    No Comments

A leopard never changes his spots

It has not even been a month since PPP took over the power reigns but Zardari sahib is back to his old antics. As reported in Dawn Zardari’s cousin has started encroaching on other people’s land with the help of the local police. A leopard indeed never changes his spots.

The story goes like this:

NAWABSHAH, April 16: Dozens of people belonging to Zardari clan staged a demonstration outside the press club here on Wednesday in protest against a cousin of Pakistan People’s Party co-chairman Asif Ali Zardari accusing him of encroaching upon their land with the help of police.

The protesters, including Ms Shahnaz, Ms Fouzia and Aijaz Ali Zardari of Islam Khan Zardari village, told journalists that a heavy contingent of police led by Aftab Zardari, cousin of Asif Ali Zardari, raided their village in the morning that day, beat up men, women and children, looted cash, valuables and animals and razed more than 20 houses.

They said that police arrested dozens of their relatives including Zahid Hussain, Maqbool Hussain, Ghulam Mustafa, Ghulam Shabbir and Ali Nawaz.

They said that they had purchased some 45 acres of land in the village through a bank auction years ago and Aftab Zardari had been trying to encroach upon their property ever since they constructed their residences on the land.

Asif Ali Zardari had settled the dispute between them and his cousin when he had come to Nawabshah after release from jail but Aftab never followed his decision, they claimed.

They said that as loyal PPP voters they made an appeal to PPP co-chairman to intervene in the matter and provide them justice.

But Aftab Zardari dismissed the protesters charges denying his involvement in or even awareness about any raid on the village. He had purchased 42 acres in the village but could not take possession of the property due to illegal encroachment by some people, he said.

He said that he had all the legal and valid documents, which proved that the property was his and had also won a case in civil court about the land’s ownership. Asif Ali Zardari knew well about the matter and he had offered the encroachers alternative accommodation but they refused, he said.

DPO, SP of Investigation and concerned investigation officers were not available for comments the raid on the village.

The SHO of taluka police station Sain Rakhio said that investigation police raided the village to arrest some culprits after Aftab Zardari’s manager Ali Hassan Zardari lodged an FIR stating that some armed people had encroached upon his land. The armed encroachers had attacked the raiding, the police official claimed.

Apr 15, 2008 - Society    No Comments

Hitler’s disciple

I quoted Ardesher Cowasjee in one of my previous posts where he said that unless a leader who has Iman and Insaniyat springs up from somewhere, we will remain a failing state.

I came across another gem (this time about racism) since then, Peshawar High Court Bar Association’s President Latif Afridi was caught on Geo saying that “If it is demanded that Afghanis are sent back to Afghanistan, then muhajirs should also be sent back to Hindustan.” Not only did he say that in a high court bar association gathering, the august lawyer’s community clapped and cheered the esteemed Afridi sahib heartily on his sage comments. The esteemed lawyer was not only rude enough to demand that Pakistanis who were born and brought up in the country should go back to India because their ancestors were stupid enough to come to Pakistan, he also called all of them looters and usurpers. He said that all Muhaijirs (I personally loath that term) are looters who have taken over the land of Sindhis. If he had any grouse against a political party, he was free to voice his concerns but open racism against 10 per cent of the population living in three major urban centres is bigotry of highest order.

The funny thing is, Afridi sahib is a former member of Human Rights Commission of Pakistan but he knows nothing about the basic right of a group of people to form political affiliations which can be different than his own. Afridi sahib is also famous for demanding and advocating for open and unpatrolled borders between Pakistan and Afghanistan. I only wonder why is he so vehemently ask for a situation which only helps smugglers who smuggle wheat to Afghanistan and bring back drugs and weapons to Pakistan. A patriotic Pakistani would not object to closing down the borders; open borders only help smugglers and Taliban operatives. If Hitler had been alive, he would have been very happy to have found such an ardent student of racism.

The learned wakeel sahib needs to take some classes in International Law 101 where he should be taught the difference between born citizens, naturalized citizens, invaders and refugees so that he will not make the mistake again and would learn to differentiate between citizens of Pakistan and Afghan refugees and their respective rights.

Oops, I forgot, citizens of Pakistan have no rights to speak of. After all, racist societies do not much care for rights of its citizen. We have seen it in Nazi Germany and Rwanda in the past and we are seeing it now in Darfur and Pakistan

Apr 15, 2008 - Shoaib Akhtar    No Comments

All about restoration


This Friday Times cartoon best capture the restoration hysteria that has engulfed our country.
First it was about restoring the judiciary, then the politicians ask for restoration of Lal Masjid Khateeb (yeah, the same cleric who ran away in a black Burqa) and now some of them (read PM Gilani, Senator Enver Baig and MNA Hanif Abbasi) want to restore Shoaib Akhtar!

And I call for the restoration of Sanity!

PS: you can see the cartoon in original size if you click on the photo.

Apr 3, 2008 - Uncategorized    No Comments

People are strange, but politicians are beyond strange

While I am at it, let me share this picture of Asif Zardari which should jog us out of collective amnesia. How Mr. Holier than thou Nawaz Sharif put him behind bar and tortured him (Husband of a political rival Benazeer Bhutto) while he was behind bars. How can Zardari forget it all, or has he not forgotten it all and is just bidding his time? Only time will tell.

People are strange, but politicians are beyond strange.

Apr 3, 2008 - Uncategorized    No Comments

After reconciling with PML-N and ANP, Zardari is mending ways with MQM. Who would have thought that Asif Zardari, the man with notorious Mr. Ten Percent tag would become the smooth suave politician who will be responsible for bringing all the warring political parties at a point where they can have a working relationship.

How things have changed. Only time will tell if the leopard has really changed the spot or is it all momentary lapse.

Mar 25, 2008 - Society, Yousuf Raza Gilani    No Comments

Boobie groping or Boobie guarding?

Somebody was singing the praises of the newly elected PM Syed Yousuf Raza Gilani on an online forum. As I was truly galactically screwed by PM’s protocol the night before, this is what I responded with.
“Yeah Gilani the Groper. In case you have forgotten, it is the same guy who was immortalized in the youtube video where he was trying grope a fellow female politician (hence he will always be remembered by boobie trap) in a rally. He got elected last evening, then flew to Karachi to attend his son’s wedding with Peer Pagara’s grand daughter (in case people here don’t know, Peer Pagara also happens to be Gilani’s khalo or maternal uncle) and blocked the traffic for four hours as every lane near the wedding venue was blocked off. I got stuck at a relative’s home and managed to reach home at 2.00 am after the PM’s protocol party opened the roads.

So, after these elections, we chose a man who became a youtube legend (there are two entries of the same video with over 160,000 views) for groping – but hey, what red blooded Pakistani male would not do that?

The newly elected PM is a close relative of Peer Pagara who defines the word ‘establishment’ which also tells us how ‘independent’ the new PM will be. 

To this, I got this response from a gentleman.
“Alright… that is a news for me! No wonder PIR PAGARA is considered a KING MAKER and everyone seek his blessings to stay in the corridors of power!

Mr. Gillani is a human and he may have got carried away at that time. Or may be, what looked ‘boobie groping’ then could actually be ‘boobie guarding’ in that unruly crowd. We must give that benefit of doubt to our new ‘elected’ leader for the sake of JO QAUM APNAY LEADER KI IZZAT NAHEE KARTI… WHO AGAY NAHEE BADHTI!

Besides, who is a clean person in Pakistan’s politiKs today?”

Boobie guarding, now this is fucking hilarious.

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