Tagged with " Film Review"
Apr 7, 2008 - Saif Ali Khan    No Comments

Drool fest

At the behest of my numerous friends (you know who you are), I finally managed to find three hours to spare and convinced my colleagues to go and watch “Race” this weekend. Needless to say I was disappointed.
The minute I entered the cinema, the thing that struck me was, “Dude, is this some high school gathering?” The foyer was full of teenage kids, I even asked my colleague D if we were the oldest people over there. She pointed out a few aunties standing in a corner with their daughters. It has happened with me before; I went to see Scary Movie 3 with my roomies back in UK and it turned out that we were the only people in their twenties who were stupid enough to spend 6 pounds for Scary Movie, I quite felt like an idiot. This film has a PG 13 rating in India but no such rating was awarded by our censor board and there were quite a few preteen kids watching the film on their own and with their mothers.
Anyways, the film was quite exhausting. I actually got tired after watching it, too many twists and turns in the plot, car chases, murder attempts and what not. The dress designer was snoring while he designed clothes for the ladies. They all wore similar mini skirts despite being in very different professions (there was a model, an executive assistant to a CEO, and a police wali). Katrina Kaif’s Blue dress in a dance number was a horrendous Las Vegas’ show girl cast off; no wonder Saif Ali Khan refused to take up her offer of ‘touch me, kiss me’.
Akshay Khanna’s hairy chest was a little too much for my sensibilities. It reaffirmed my belief that metro sexuality is the best way to be for men. If women can get hot wax poured over their bodies, so can men. Someone need to tell Bipasha Basu that she cannot stay in the same posture if she wants to be called an actress. All she do is stand with her shoulders pulled back, chest stuck out and tummy sucked, ready to preen. It might work in modeling but acting requires a lot more than that. Oh no, actually it does not. She has been doing it for quite some time and getting away with it. Anil Kapoor’s dialogues were full of crass double entendre and were in really bad taste. His character was based on Ellen DeGeneres’s character in Goodbye Lover. Did I forget to mention the fact that the film was lifted from “Goodbye Lover?” The screen writer/director replaced a more mundane white collar environment of an ad agency with a stud farm (perhaps so that they can show Saif Ali Khan riding horses and a hot & steamy scene in the stables) and bended the gender of the detective (Ellen DeGenress played the role played by Anil Kapoor) but they remain loyal to the story otherwise.
The only redeeming factor – read person – in the film was Saif Ali Khan. What eye candy!!! I am yet to see a desi man looking this good in a suit. Ladies, it’s a total drool fest with Saif, go watch it if you have not already done that. Its totally worth it.
Mar 26, 2008 - Uncategorized    No Comments

Killing me softly

I have had what you call a chick-flick week.
Not only did I watch three Jane Austen films (Emma, Northanger Abbey and Persuasion) in a row (ok, I am demented, I get it), I also watched Jane Austen Book Club, a book about five Californian women and a man who form a book club to discuss the works of the celebrated writer but also had the ulterior motive of improving their love lives after taking cue from Ms. Austen.

But the chick flick which I am certain would be soon made into a Bollywood musical is not any of the above mentioned films. The film that is sure to see a hindi remake is Katherine Heigl, James Marsden starrer 27 Dresses. Heigl plays a selfless woman who helps out her girl friends by being their bridesmaid – a horrendous 27 times. In addition she plays adoring PA to her hotshot boss who’s blissfully oblivious to his employee’s infatuation. Her beautiful sister comes along and gets engaged to the boss and then enters Marsden, a cynical wedding reporter (is that an oxymoron or is that an oxymoron?) who wanted to do a feature on a woman who is always, always, always the bridesmaid but ends up falling for our heroine and they all live happily ever after.

It has become a standard practice of late that every successful romantic comedy (or the not so successful romcoms) soon sees its Hindi version. The most recent was Partner which was very loud, crass, yet yawn inducing copy of Will Smith’s Hitch. So cheeky have they become that they call lifting every scene frame for frame, mere inspiration! Some are so shameless that they even copy the name of the film (Mere Yaar Ki Shadi Hai was a bad remake of My Best Friend’s wedding).
So be ready to see Rani Mukerji or some other actress like her (can’t have a glamazon in that role) reprising the role of Hiegl as the self sacrificing shareef heroine silently in love with her smooth and suave boss (probably John Abraham – seriously, cant think of anyone else who fits the bill of good looking yet vacant and single dimensional). Enters the glamorous young sister (could be any of the former models or pageant winners) who makes the suave boss fall for her. Now, who is going to save our heroine from the cold clutches of impending spinsterhood; a cheeky but extremely good looking Saif Ali Khan who wins her heart and make her realise that there is more to men than just being ridiculously rich and good looking; they have to be smart and witty along with being ridiculously good looking. They hold hands and walk into the sunset … or whatever.
Shit, I actually wrote the plot of a bollywood masala musical. I seriously need to get a life and do something other than watching escapist cinema. It is killing me softly; before I know it, I would be dead, at least intellectually.
Any suggestions people???
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