My friend B claims that I seriously lack charm and poise when it comes to accepting compliments. I obviously rejected her claim. Not that I get that many compliments (and I am counting ‘balls breaking bitch’ in the category of compliments) but I thought I was taking them enough élan and elegance. These are the flowing examples cited by my friend as sentences dripping in unnecessary sarcasm.
Tazeen, you write really well.
Oh I just rant, if you are half as dissatisfied with life as I am, you too would be able to go on like I do.
You know, you are funny.
Really, I thought only court jesters were funny.
You have very beautiful eyes.
Huh! And I thought it was Rimmel’s deep black kohl and my expertise with make up.
God, you are photogenic, the camera loves you:
Does that mean I look hideous in person?
You are smart.
In the sea of mediocrity, even common sense looks like a stroke of genius.
Another friend who studied psychology as a minor back in college jumped in and called it my denial of my talent. Talent!!! You can’t call being photogenic a talent, can you? She also used words like deep rooted fear of acceptance, delayed maturity and lack of emotional intelligence and God knows what else; I did not hear the rest because I had tuned her off after emotional intelligence.
Come on people, batting lashes at the poor sod who tells you your eyes are beautiful is as clichéd as it gets. Am I the only one who thought my responses were smart, flippant and dripping with self effacing humor?
I believe in fighting flattery with flippancy – no?