May 23, 2008 - Society    No Comments

Happy and gay

Someone, lets call him ‘J’, recently asked me if I have any gay friends. After going over all my current friends, I had to relent that I have no gay friends. I mean I had a couple of really cool friends back in university who also happened to be gay and I have worked with gay people (one of my former bosses was gay, although no one is Pakistan ever comes out of closet and admits it) in the past. Perhaps Begum Nawazish Ali was the only exception who openly claimed to be an icon for gays, cross dressers and all things un straight but even he seems to be mending his ways and is now looking for a dulhaniya very actively. Yes, there are a people or two who I suspect are off the ‘straight and narrow’ path but as they still are in the closet, I cannot claim to have friends who are happy and gay.

Anyways, when I asked J why was he interested in my supposedly gay friends, he said (no, I am not joking) that he always wanted to have gay friends because it will add diversity in his group of friends and acquaintances. He actually believed that being a social misfit that I am, I must have had a friend who goes the ‘other way’.

I was truly intrigued with this idea. Do people actually seek out gay friends so that can claim to be open minded and cool? There was just one way of finding out so I wrote to this friend of mine (from university) and asked him if he is ‘oh so popular because he is gay’.

He said that he would hate to think that he is only popular because he is gay – and he is popular – but whenever he meets a new set of people, they do gather around him and ask really stupid questions. People have asked him everything from the most obvious one ‘when did you find out you were gay’ to relatively personal one ‘How do you know you’re really gay if you’ve never been with a woman?’ to extremely personal one such as ‘how do you feel when ^&(*&*#$ and @%#@$%* and *@$%$’. Mind you, my friend is a Greek man who lives in Chicago, Illinois, imagine this conversation in a desi set up with two aunties frowning up on you for socializing with the spawn of heathens. That sure as hell will spook the living day lights out of you.

One of the reasons my gay friend pointed out which adds to the popularity of gay people is that if they ever make a pass at straight people, it would give the straight people fodder for a party story for the rest of their lives that how they are so irresistible that people of the same sex make passes at them.

What about you guys? Do you actively seek out gay friends? And girls, do you all want a ‘Will’ to your ‘Grace’? And gays, do you guys really get bombarded with weird queries?

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